6:50am Roll out of bed. This is way too late and I don’t have time to take a shower.

7:00am Wash my face, moisturize. Try some new makeup colors and tie a scarf around my head to help disguise crazy bed head. [you’ll notice I forgot to brush my teeth. ew]

7:25am Out the door to drop my daughter off at school.

7:30am “No, you cannot put Benadryl in her drink to make her fall asleep so you can prank her.” Short lecture on medicine safety.

7:37am Have a good day, daughter.

7:45am Stop for gas. Realize I have ‘80s power blush and orange lips. Use a baby wipe to try and calm that blush down. Cover the orange lips (because of course I used a stain) with a neutral lipstick from my purse.

8:00am Starbucks. Needed it.

8:20am Pull into the parking deck. Struggle to retie the scarf that I knocked out of place.

8:25am Selfie time because I love my short hair. Post the selfie to Facebook because I love compliments. Oh come on, you know you do it too.

8:30am Work!

9:10am Discover the poster I am supposed to be getting printed has metallic ink. The quote didn’t cover metallic ink. Get a new quote. Develop a condition I like to call “explodey-head.”

9:50am Sell some Girl Scouts cookies. I always have time for a cookie hustle.

10:15am Committee work is my own personal hell.

10:20am Discover the Mini Museum Kickstarter. Support it. Woot!

10:30am Vanilla latte. #2 overpriced drink of the day. Needed it.

11:00am Conference call. Luckily, I’m first on the agenda and hardly needed for the rest.

11:20am Spill coffee down the front of my dress. Use my last remaining Shout wipe to try and get it off while juggling the phone (still on that conference call) with my other hand.

12:06pm Ouch, my foot hurts. Contemplated opening the box of cookies under my desk. Resisted the temptation.

12:15pm Move on to some data entry for a digital system. Nice to zone out in something.

12:50pm Break time! Hobble over to the next building to deliver a cookie order. Now I only have one left from my list. My husband – who sold a lot more – isn’t as lucky.

1:00pm Back to work!

1:15pm Stomach growled and I realized coffee and foamy milk were the only things in my stomach. Heated up my lunch and worked through my lunch break.

2:25pm Data entry makes me sleep. Time to take a wake-me-up walk around the building. Well, a hobble around the building.

3:10pm Do I have a snack? Why don’t I have any snacks in this desk? Remind myself that I don’t want to open the cookies. It takes a few tries, but I’m eventually convinced.

4:30pm Done! Hobble back to the parking deck. Today turned my brain to mush. Husband is picking up both kids since my foot hurts.

4:47pm Drive through liquor store. Tonight I will enjoy my signature cocktail – a bottle of wine.

4:52pm Stopped at Sonic for drinks for the family.

5:04pm Home!

5:06pm Wine! [okay, that is an exaggeration]

5:10pm Pajamas! [that is not an exaggeration]

5:45pm Big important talk with my husband about a mistake I’ve made. [more on that next week] Followed by relief.

6pm-10pm(ish) Nothing. Dinner, wine, television, homework. Feet up, relaxed. Even the kids cooperated.


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